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Some Errands and a Church Service Part 2

April 6, 2018


This post is part two of a two-part series:

  • Part 1
  • Part 2 (You are here)

Church Parking Lot
I had completed all of my outings in time to be able to go to the church.  My wife asked me not to be out late.  I decided I would only be able to stay for a class before the church service.  Their web site called the classes “small groups”.  I pulled into the parking lot.  I found a parking space.  I felt tense, but I do not think I was afraid.  I was not trembling like I sometimes do.  I did forget to change into my heels.

My only preconceived notions that I have of this kind of church are based on some neighbors I used to have.  They always came home from church well dressed in suits and ties and dresses.  I could hear the wife play old, traditional hymns on the piano in their apartment.  My wife and I loved it.  We would sing along.  Because of that family, I assumed that this church would be very traditional, and very conservative.  They might allow me to attend, but the might not be comfortable with me.  Somehow, that expectation did not stop me from wanting to attend the church.  I had even worked out in my mind how to politely leave if they said I could not stay.

Greeter in the Lobby
I got out of my car and started walking through parking lot.  I thought, “What am I doing!?”  Then I thought, “Oh, I forgot to change into my heels!”  At the very moment when I put my hand on the door handle, I saw a woman in the lobby look at me through the glass door.  She was a greeter.  I sensed a moment of hesitation in her while I opened the door.  Then, she welcomed me and walked up to me.  There were a few other people in the lobby.  One of them, a man, approached me.  I think he was also a greeter.

I told the woman that it was my first visit to her church and that I wanted to attend a small group.  She welcomed me and she asked the man to take me to a class.  He started asking questions to figure out what would be the best class for me.  Then, off we went.  I thought, “Wow, this is not very different from going to church in pants.”  The man and I talked as we walked to the classroom.

Up to this point, I felt as exposed and as obvious as a loudly ringing bell.

Small Group Class
The man who was guiding me took me to a classroom and introduced me to the three older people in the room.  There were two quiet men, and there was one rather chatty woman.  I awkwardly sat on the aisle seat in the next-to-last row of chairs.  The woman talked to me non-stop.  A few others came in.  They did not speak to me.

At one point, the chatty woman said, “There she is.”  A tall woman in a pretty blue dress came in.  She sat down in front of me and started talking to the chatty woman.  I realized quickly that this person might be transgender.  She was about 60 years old.  She had long, natural hair.  They talked for a few minutes about nothing in particular.  Then the lady in the blue dress left the room.

Others came in.  I started thinking, “Would anyone be comfortable enough to sit on my row?”  I was on the aisle seat, so they would have to walk past me to do it.  Eventually, a man did join me on my row.  He sat on the opposite end, by the wall.  There were two chairs between us.  The teacher arrived.  He never greeted me, but he did greet some others.  I said, “Good morning,” to him later when he walked by me.  Then he spoke to me.  Later, he gave me a book so I could participate in the class.

A Bold Handshake That Meant A Lot
The class started about fifteen minutes after the website said that small groups started.  Therefore, I sat in a room of people for twenty minutes waiting and socializing.  At the beginning of class, a 55 year old woman entered and sat across the aisle from me.  By the time she had gotten settled, the teacher was teaching.  This woman reached over and offered to shake my hand across the aisle in front of everyone.  I felt warm and happy during, and after, that handshake!

Someone Sat By Me
The class continued and people kept arriving.  The seats were filling up.  Many women were dressed like me.  I was not overdressed.  That is rare!

Another man entered and sat on my row.  There was an empty seat between us.  I reached out and shook his hand.  He quietly told me his name.  I will call him “Peter”.  Later a man and his wife arrived.  There were no more pairs of seats available.  Peter moved and let them sit on my row.  The woman sat by me.  Then, her husband sat in the other seat.  She was wearing a pretty, bold patterned skirt as well.  I liked sitting by her.  She never interacted with me during class.

Class continued.  Many people contributed to the discussion.  Others arrived.  Every chair in the room was eventually filled.  There were about 25 people in the room.  I never spoke during the class.  Interestingly, neither did the chatty woman.

Friendly People After Class
Class ended.  The woman beside me introduced herself to me.  I will call her “Mary.”  While I was still seated, a woman from behind came to me and put her hand on my shoulder.  I had to turn and look up at her.  She was smiling warmly.  She welcomed me.  Another woman from the back row also gave me a friendly smile from a distance.  I cannot remember how many people welcomed me after class.  It was from 4-6 people.  Interestingly, most people who spoke to me patted me on my arm or shoulder.

I waited in the back of the room for some people to walk out.  I needed someone to lead the way to where to go next.  A woman walked up to me.  She also welcomed me.  I told her that I loved her outfit.  She thanked me.  People were leaving, so I started moving toward the door.  That last woman who welcomed me spoke to me as I was leaving.  She was looking at my outfit.  She told me, “I really like that skirt.”  I thanked her and told her how I also loved it.

I walked out of the door.  Down the hall, two 13 year old girls were socializing.  One saw me.  There was a moment of surprise on her face.  She saw me looking back at her.  Then, she smiled very pleasantly at me.  Peter walked out of the classroom after I did.  I asked him if he could tell me where the men’s room was.  He said he would show me.  We walked along together talking.

We turned into a hallway.  People were walking toward us.  So, imagine this: Peter was walking down the hall, talking to a man in a skirt, while his peers were walking toward us.  I was mostly at ease by this point, so I was rather comfortable with this.  The people walking toward us were not sure how to respond, I think.  They were having a conversation.  They looked at me and vaguely smiled.  I greeted them.  They greeted me.  They kept talking.  Peter and I kept talking.  We passed.

Mens Restroom
We entered the men’s room.  Peter went to his place, and I went to a stall.  I have to use a stall because it is complicated to use the men’s room in a skirt and shapewear and pantyhose.  I was not going to go through that awkward process at a urinal!

Peter finished and left.  Other men entered the restroom.  I finished and went to the sink to wash my hands.  I really did not care that there were other men in there.  That was a big change from the first time I used a busy public men’s room in a skirt!  It was not much more uncomfortable than just being around strangers in general.  When I was at the sink, I realized that the two other men were from my class.

Mary’s husband was one of the men.  He started talking to me.  He asked if I was new to the area, etc.  We walked out of the men’s room talking.

Seeing the Greeter Again
I returned to the entrance where the greeter first spoke to me.  She was still there.  This time, she had no hesitation.  She walked right up to me and started telling me where to go to next.  I told her that I could not stay.  She expressed disappointment and told me that it was going to be a special service because the next day was Easter.  I wanted to stay.  I decided, I would go and see ten minutes of it before leaving.

She told me where to go.  As I walked the circuitous path to get there, I found that I was walking through the children’s wing.  I normally try to avoid children when I am crossdressed.  Fortunately, only three children around the age of three or four saw me.  They noticed me.  After that, I did not see any kids in the children’s wing.  They were gone because it was almost time for the main service to begin.

Into the Sanctuary
I entered the lobby outside of the sanctuary.  A woman handed me a bulletin.  She welcomed me in.  I walked in and sat on the back row so I could exit early and not cause draw much attention to myself.

There was a countdown on the projector.  Some people greeted me as they entered.  Some of them patted me on my shoulder.  (There is just a lot of shoulder patting at this place!)  Either people seemed happy to see me, or they ignored me.  One man, however, walked by giving my outfit a long look.  That was the only negative reaction I received.

A song began.  A family from my class joined me.  I scooted toward the aisle so they could fit to my right.  There was one seat between me and a man.

After the first song and the announcement time, I told the man to my right that I was going to leave during the next song.  I told him that I did not want him to think it was because he was sitting there.  He smiled and said he understood.  He added that they were visitors.  I said I was too.  He said, “Well, I am sure that you are welcome.”

Goodbye to the Greeter
I left during the next song.  I went back to the entrance.  The greeter woman spoke to me again.  There was a man there as well.  He was the first man who sat on my row in my class.  We all three talked for a few minutes.  She told me to come back when I am in town.  I think her exact words were, “You ARE coming back, aren’t you?”  I left and went home.


This is a picture of a dumb dumb who did not think to get
a picture with the greeter at church.


From → True Stories

  1. Pat Scales permalink

    I am glad that your visit to the church worked out so well. I think that churches are wonderful and that most religious people have a love of God and a love of others and will be tolerant and not do anything to offend people.
    I have had only one similar experience. I was on a business trip and noticed that a Catholic church was having a Thursday evening Mass. It was summer so I wore a brown and white print dress with beige hose. I had on a light wig with reasonably modest makeup. As I sat in the car trying to call up the courage to enter the church I opted for my beige flats rather than my heels. In hindsight while the flats were perfect the heels would have been fine also.
    People greeted me and were friendly and had nothing but smiles for me. It was one of the most positive crossdressing experiences of my life. In the middle of the service they actually had a baptism. After the service was done I was invited to stay but I did get a bit chicken and left for other places to go that evening.

    • For what were you invited to stay?
      My first religious-connected outing experience was a stop at a Christian bookstore. I wrote about the experience, so you may have read it. I was nervous about walking into that store. As I approached the door, a man held the door open for me. He, and everyone else was polite. I would say that this experience matched that one in many respects.

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. Some Errands and a Church Service Part 1 | joeypress
  2. What It Is Like To Be A Crossdresser (To Me) | joeypress

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