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June 7, 2020


I am going to break my normal habit of only speaking about crossdressing/fashion topics.  As I write this, we are almost two weeks into the series of protests about racial injustice/inequality.  I do not want to be quiet at this time.

Black lives matter.

These protests are not about the death of one man.  These protests are about the death of yet another man in a tapestry of many other deaths and many injustices and many inequalities.  I do not understand it all.  I did not experience any of it.  Regardless of me, it is real.

I am working on improving my understanding.  I am ashamed of how ignorant I have been.

Please find a person of color and ask them questions about their experiences.  Definitely do not argue any points.  Just listen and learn.  “What injustices/inequalities have you experienced?”  “What have you done/plan to do to in order to instruct your children how to stay out of racial trouble?”  “When do you feel unsafe/unwelcome/unjustly treated?”  “Have I ever done anything that made you feel unwelcome, unequal, inferior, etc.?”

You can ask these questions of people of other races too.  I have discovered that they have their own race-related stories.

Black lives matter.

Please make sure that black lives matter to you.

Thank you.




From → Information

  1. When one hears “Black Lives Matter”, they might interpret that to mean “Black Lives Matter more than …”. There is a common response to this sentiment. That is to talk about all lives. I feel like that is a wrong interpretation and response. That response is, generally, seen as a racist reaction. Perhaps that is not fair… or perhaps it is racism. It has to be considered case-by-case.

    I recommend that when you hear “Black Lives Matter”, instead, hear “Black Lives Matter to me”. Do they matter to you? Should we care when black lives are ended? Should we be upset? When you refuse to say “Black Lives Matter”, you are refusing to say that Black Lives Matter to you. (For example: Wife: “I love you.” Husband: “Oh, I love everyone” … It’s like that.)

    When I am driving and I hit a bug, I don’t care. But if I were to hit a dog, I would feel bad. I would likely stop and try to go find the owner and give them the bad news, or try to help the owner rescue the dog if it is still alive. Why? Because dog lives matter to me more than bug lives.

    There is a complicated, unspoken hierarchy of importance of lives that we all hold. Some lives are more important than others. Some say that all lives matter. But do they matter equally to you? Do Black Lives Matter to you?

    I posted this comment because someone posted a comment on this blog post, talking about “all lives” mattering. Then they went right into being willing to defend their home and possessions violently. The rhetoric sounded racist to me, so I did not allow the comment through. But, out of respect to the person who posted it, I thought I should add this comment for clarity.

    Again, I recommend: Go find a black person, ask questions, don’t argue, and try to listen. Listen, and try to hear their heart. I am trying to do this, and I am hearing things that I did not expect. I am learning. I am trying. Please, try.

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  1. My Thoughts On Passing | joeypress

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